192 ☼ Taking Back My Attention
+ testing new Kentmere Pan 200 film for 120
Dear friends,
I’ve spent the past few weeks trying to get my attention back. Not for the first time. Likely not for the last.
This isn’t a big statement of digital purity. I still hit the Reddit button out of habit some days, and late-night scrolling hasn't been eradicated entirely. But I’ve been tinkering with a system that helps me manage my attention, and slowly it’s working.
Also, I have my first solo exhibition in the Netherlands coming up in June!
In this week’s issue:
A few tweaks and rules that are actually helping me manage my attention.
Some thoughts about focus, overload, and trying to feel more human.
Film Review: Black-and-white portraits from Studio Perzia, shot on the newly released Kentmere Pan 200 film stock. All the images in this issue were shot on it!
Maybe a first ever hidden easter egg link in the new Project Updates section…?
Quick Notes
New Exhibition! — I'm excited to share that I’ll have a solo show at FotoFestival Naarden this summer, the oldest photo festival in the Netherlands. Even more special: it’s 30 years to the day since my dad had a solo show at the same festival. I’ll share behind-the-scenes updates in future Process issues. Opens June 13.
Love Book — I found 4 copies of What We Think We Know About Love in storage. If you missed out last time, this will be officially your last chance. Available here.
The Best Medicine Zine Release — Only 25 of the 250 tickets are left for the May 17 release party at De Balie. Your ticket includes a copy of the zine. Grab one here.
My Attention Had Left the Building
A few weeks ago I noticed, not for the first time, that I was letting my attention get hijacked again. Doomscrolling before I even got out of bed. Reddit rabbit holes during work. A quick check of messages that somehow turned into 20 minutes gone. Just one more dopamine snack. Just one more.
What it steals from me is agency: the ability to decide what kind of day I want to have. It eats up the calm I need to think clearly, to work with intention, to make space for actual ideas. A morning spent bouncing between headlines and notifications usually ends with a day that feels scattered, rushed, and a little foggy.
This isn’t some shocking new insight. I’ve been here before. The tech changes, the pattern doesn’t. I get to a point where everything feels thin and noisy and I realize, again: I need guardrails. I have to set boundaries or this stuff eats the whole day.
And just to be clear, there’s no shame in needing boundaries. These systems are designed to pull us in. Some of the smartest people on the planet are literally paid to figure out how to bypass your good intentions. We can’t outsmart them, but we can try to protect ourselves.
So I Made A Change
I didn’t invent anything groundbreaking. Most of this you’ve almost certainly heard before. But I needed the reminder. Maybe you do too.
The phone sleeps elsewhere at night. I charge it in another room. Emergency calls from a few family members can still get through, but most importantly it stays out of sight.
No phone, no internet before 9am. That means no email, no news, no social media. The phone stays in its overnight cubby. I don’t just avoid my phone, I avoid the internet entirely. If I can click it, I will click it. So I remove the option.
Instead, I make breakfast. I read books or, mostly, long-form articles I’ve saved to Readwise Reader on my tablet. I highlight what resonates and makes me think, I add notes to articles, and sometimes those highlights and notes become the seeds for my writing or photo projects. The tablet feels more like a reading tool than a portal, because it has no social media apps and stays offline, except for one sync a day to download new articles and upload highlights. I cannot teleport away, to use a turn of phrase I’ve heard Craig Mod use. I am in this one place, in the real world, and present.
The computer has boundaries too. I use blockers to cut off Reddit and the usual suspects until after 5pm. Then they shut down again at 9. Not because I’m trying to be a productivity robot, but because I’d rather use my energy on things that matter, including non-work things. Willpower is not an unlimited resource, and I’d rather not spend it fighting the pull of garbage content.
Three short breaks a day. Just 15 minutes each. A walk, a snack, a book. No screens. These help me avoid falling into ADHD hyperfocus mode that leaves me wrung out like a dishrag.
Phone off after 9:30pm. Still working on this one. But when I manage it, I sleep better. I think more clearly. I stop filling my brain with stray content bullets before bed. I read more books. I get my own thoughts back.
The point here isn’t to become a monk. It’s to feel more in charge of how I spend my time. When I end the day with a scroll, I feel worse. Not dramatically worse, just...more dulled. More anxious. When I end it with a good book and some silence, I feel like a human being again.
It’s only been a few weeks, but already I feel the difference. I’m reading more. Thinking more clearly. My attention isn’t constantly getting chewed up and spit back out. My days feel fuller, calmer, more directed. And that’s how I want to live, with some calm, some focus, and the agency to put thoughtful work into the world.
Craig Mod nailed it in his 2017 piece How I Got My Attention Back:
"Attention is a muscle. It must be exercised. Though, attention is duplicitous—it doesn’t feel like a muscle. And exercising it doesn’t result in an appreciably healthier looking body. But it does result in a sense of grounding, feeling rational, control of your emotions—a healthy mind." (link)
I’m not trying to live offline in a cabin with a goat and a field recorder. But I also don’t want to live like I’m constantly one tap away from disappearing into a jittery or dissociative state.
Jia Tolentino said it bluntly in The New Yorker just a few days ago:
"Much of what we see now is fake, and the reality we face is full of horrors. More and more of the world is slipping beyond my comprehension." (link)
That line hit hard. I’m not trying to escape reality. I’m trying to meet it with enough presence to do something useful. And to do that, I need to stop letting someone else script the start and end of my day.
This isn’t a grand declaration. Just a field note from someone still trying to get it right. But what I’ve noticed is this: some clarity opens up space. A small habit builds momentum. One less scroll might make room for something I actually care about.
Re: Readwise
Whenever I find myself loving a tool that helps me make better work, and the company is small enough that I can actually reach a human being there, I try to write them a note. Something simple: "Hey, I love what you’ve built. Thank you."
I know how much those notes can matter to hard-working independent makers. Some of you have sent me lovely ones about Process or my projects and books, and I think about them more often than you'd expect. They keep me going!
So I sent a message to the folks at Readwise to say how much I appreciated their app, and told them I was going to include it in this issue. They generously offered a special link for Process readers: 2 free months (double the usual trial). Check it out here.
Heads up: if you subscribe after the free trial, I get a small commission. I’d already planned to share Readwise either way. This issue was written before they even offered the link. They didn’t see this ahead of time, and were not involved in what I wrote.
Your Turn
Do you have any tips from your own experience around this topic you can share in the comments? Any rituals or rules that help you hold onto your attention? I’d love to hear about them, and I’m sure the other readers would too. Let’s do this together.
If you found this issue interesting or helpful, do me a small favor. Take 5 seconds to share it with just one person, and then have a quick chat about what stood out to you both. That kind of conversation keeps these ideas moving and meaningful.
Let’s keep shooting, learning, and sharing together—one messy, human step at a time.
Warmly,
Wesley
PS Many thanks to Taylor Foster for his excellent assisting and BTS work on these shoots.
📷 What I Used This Week
People often ask what I’m using and here’s this week’s setup:
Camera: Pentax 67ii with the 105mm 2.4 lens. Canon EOS R5 and the Canon RF 24-70 mm f/2.8 L IS USM.(For a full review of this set up, check out Process 173.)
Film Stock: I tested out the brand-new Kentmere Pan 200 black-and-white film in 120 format during a portrait shoot at Studio Perzia. This is Harman’s new consumer-level stock, and since they’re the folks behind Ilford, I was curious how it would hold up.
Well, color me impressed! The grain has character without being overbearing. The ISO 200 rating gives it versatility, which make it easy to overexpose on a sunny day, but it still performs nicely when the light dips a bit. I shot everything using natural light, and the results feel strong, especially considering the lower point. Just because it's marketed as consumer film doesn't mean it isn't capable of serious work.
This issue is supported by MPB.com — my go-to for buying, selling, or trading used photo and video gear. Everything comes with a 6-month warranty, and their support helps keep Process going.
Lab: My film is processed by Carmencita Film Lab. I trust them fully for both their work and their humanity. Use code "PROCESS" for a free upgrade on your next order.
Next Week
The launch of The Best Medicine zine, including a recap of the release party (grab your tickets now, only 25 left)), a behind-the-scenes look at how the project came together, a special BTS photo gallery, an analog bonus portrait gallery, and some thoughts on how I plan and execute projects like this from start to finish.
Support Process & Elevate Your Photography
If these Sunday issues give you something—energy, motivation, a new way of seeing—you can support Process by picking up a book or joining the Process Photo Club.
Process Workbook Volume One & Two: Creative prompts and assignments designed to get you out of your head and into action with your camera.
€8.99 each (free for Process Photo Club members)
NOTICE Journal, Volume One: A fresh perspective on beauty and rebirth, shot in Amsterdam.
€40 (or €20 for Process Photo Club members)
📚 Order here and you help keep Process accessible to all.
🗃️ Browse the Process Archives.
📜 Read the Process Manifesto.
📷 Add yourself to the Process Photo Assistant Database
🚧 Currently Working On1
Currently Working On / Project Updates (r = release date)
The Best Medicine — Prepping release show, hidden bts video shhhh (r: May 17)
Process Redesign — Waiting on sketches from Maxwell (r: Jun)
NJV1 Exhibition — We printed the works this week at Temple Studios! (r: TBA)
Process Workbook, Vol. 3 — Writing assignments (r: Jun)
Creatives In/AMS — Pitch mode for sponsors (r: Sept)
NOTICE Journal, Volume Two — Developing concept
25 in 2025 — Set up master document, planning shoots (r: Nov 7)
I love this openness. Don't we all struggle with attention and living our life way too much in the digital part? I try to avoid social media as much as possible and it gets better every week now I see what that regained time can bring. Also turned off all notifications so the Pavlov reaction is slipping away slowly. We will get there!
This is why: “I’m not trying to escape reality. I’m trying to meet it with enough presence to do something useful”
That’s such a challenge, I think even with a structure to pay attention it’s difficult. Bravo to you for keeping it in mind.
I have several things, one is 20 minutes of sitting quietly every morning. Another is noting the one thing I want to address today. Not necessarily complete, just address. Something positive, which in my imagination equates to useful. There are other supporting structures but I’d call those the “Big Two”
Thanks for posting this!